Blessings and Dreams

As I have been praying, pondering and playing over the past week I have realized two things.

First of all, I am SO VERY BLESSED!! I have a large group of amazing people surrounding me. People to play with, pray with, lean on, and talk with. I have a fellowship of solid believers, people that challenge me to grow my relationship with the Lord, people that encourage me in the hard times and lift me up.

Secondly, I know what I would do if I could do anything in the world--I would get a part time job that pays the sames as a full time job. This way I could support myself and have plenty of time to create fellowship, hospitality and community happen. How do I do this?!

No, I do NOT have a job!

Around close of business a couple Thursdays ago got an email:

We have had your CV returned to us from our Stakeholders with a recommendation for us not to employ you on the grounds of experience and qualification.

It is with regret that Al Shaheen LLC is withdrawing your preliminary offer of employment.

OUCH!! Mom, Dad and I sat in the living room and cried for a bit. What do I even say to that?! I had signed an acceptance of the job offer, but the job still didn't work out. The reason is complicated and ridiculous. I have spent the week and a half since doing a lot of thinking. 

Maybe it is time to go back to school. Maybe God will provide better. I have one friend who keeps saying it is because something bigger and better is coming. To this I said, "Maybe I'll get to train elephants!" At this point anything is possible. 

I am researching schools and possible things to study at those schools. I am applying for jobs all over the place. I am asking myself, "If I could do ANYTHING in the world right now what would it be?"

SHOES!!!

Remember how I had to go shopping for a suit and I found it so hard to do? Well it was a challenge but I got through it and I learned a little something in the process. I learn two things about myself:

1. I love wearing my new suit jacket with jeans and heels. Wow. Sassy fun!

2. I LOVE SHOES!! Though I have always know I enjoyed shoes of an active nature--Chacos, Tevas, Keens, etc.--I did not know that dress shoes could be so fun!

Do I have a job?!

August 11, 2010, exactly 23 months from the day I left Albania I received a job offer!

Back in December of 2009 I was told of an organization that will be working with local High School Students to improve their interpersonal skills and increase their emotional intelligence. This was to be done with programs in the schools that use youth group/camp type activities and military training exercises that promote the development of self-esteem and skills outside of the academic. Sounded SO interesting!!

I applied immediately, was giving another person to contact, and was then told hiring would begin in February. I didn’t hear and didn’t hear. In March I heard from a third person in regards to the hiring—it had been delayed. Throughout the spring and summer I would hear from different people at the company every six weeks or so and was always told that hiring hadn’t yet begun. Four weeks ago I sent my resume (again) to an HR firm in England that had been hired to help with the hiring process. That lady informed me that I was cleared and my info had been sent to the company in the UAE. I never heard more...

UNTIL…

…Saturday the 7^th, I received a call about an interview. I interviewed the 10^th and was offered a job the 11^th. I am supposed to start around the 1^st of September and have been offered a salary that will allow me to live and get my own place to live too. Wow!

Is it too good to be true? After the last two long years I can’t imagine having a solid job that will support me. I am waiting for it to fall apart but remaining hopeful in spite of myself. 

Thursday, around 11am, I get a call. “Hello Caitlin, It is M-- with ERM. Remember me?” I did and she proceeded to ask me to come in to their office. “Could I come in Sunday? I’m really busy today.” “Well no, you meet the client Sunday?” “Oh so you are giving me a job?!” “Yes. Please come.”

I ended up going in to their office, was told they would hire me as a freelance and that I would meet the client Sunday. Wow.

I need a SUIT!! This job requires professional work cloths...hummm....

Enter wonderful Angie! Angie spent a long Friday cruising all the malls with me and helping me to understand business/professional dress. It was a VERY stressful day for me. Every time I looked in the mirror I saw someone that looked like me but was dressed oddly. I'll forever be grateful for Angie's patience and help.

Upon finally choosing the suit and purchasing it I brought it home and modeled it. "Isn't it a little snug?" inquired Mom. It was quite stressful. How could I do the job if I couldn't even find the right cloths!? Later that day I got in to the actual work and enjoyed it. Though I shopping is a huge challenge I enjoyed the work!

That job is now finished and once again I am waiting. 

A Possible New Career...

A Friday evening in Abu Dhabi; a creative, wonderful friend hosting a theme party… A ROCK STAR IS BORN!

With a month’s notice before the night of the “Red Carpet Rock Star” party I was able to be fully prepared:  A top from Emirates Discount Market, a guitar made of duct tape and cardboard, jewelry that belonged to grandma and great-grandma, and a wonderful sister to help with makeup, hair and shoes—I am ready!!

I didn’t know I could look like a rock star but apparently I can. 

Dad acted as my bodyguard and Mamma promoted me as my agent. *Cait-astrophy* rolled up to the party while Cait wondered if maybe she should pursue a new career. It is way too much fun to dress up, party and dance all night, and to be photographed.

Though I have NO musical skills what-so-ever, I do love to sing and party. Is that enough? Did I miss my calling?!

Post Op!

I have survived and fully recovered from my first surgery! It was wonderful now that it is over. The morning of the surgery involved a lot of waiting while wearing a BRIGHT green hospital robe. I sure felt silly. My daddy waited with me as nurses came in and out of the room getting information. Catheters hurt a lot more than I thought they would. You can feel then in your veins! Weird. The anesthesiologist was a bit crazy. She gave me a commentary on medicines I was taking though she didn't know my history or anything. I just hope there is no one that listens to her and haves major health issues!

When it came time for the surgery they wheeled me to the OR on my bed. I wanted to see where I was going so I would hold my head up and they kept telling me to relax and push me back down. As I entered surgery they cleaned the wheels of my bed... I had fun breathing in the special gas that put me to sleep. The last thing I remember was wanting to tell them that my hand felt really weird as they pumped stuff into my catheter but not being able to move. 

Next thing I know several people are crowded around me, talking to me, wiping my face, trying to get me to wake up and I was FREEZING. I began shaking uncontrollably, but then the best thing EVER happened...they put some sort of blanket on me that they blew warm air into. It inflated gently with warm air that covered and cuddled me--like a soft, inflatable, raft for floating in the pool. I so want one of these for my house!!

All too soon they were removing this and rolling me and my bed back to my room. The pain began. For several hours I was in and out of consciousness as the nurses came in and out to check on me and the effects of the anesthetic wore off. They brought me two things of ice cream--I ate two bites. 

My wonderful brother and sister came to visit me but I could only say hi and that I was sleepy. I love that they visited, but couldn't entertain them so they left after only a short while and I slept more. 

The doctor came and wanted to know how I was. I told him in a raspy voice that I hurt a lot. He laughed at me!! Apparently I smiled while saying I was in pain and no one ever does that. He said I could leave after 6pm, but he also brought more food and said I HAD to eat it before I could leave--one ice cream, one yogurt, a creme caramel pudding cup and a box of apple juice. I admit, I didn't drink the apple juice...all we know about apple juice suggests it shouldn't burn but it did, burned a lot! I didn't drink it.

At a little before 6pm Dad showed up. He brought me an adorable stuff camel, picked up my medicine and we left. I even got wheeled out in a wheel chair!!

This is my mouth tonsil free! Taken 7 days post-op.

Once again I praise God for my unemployment!! Recovery required 10 days at home and then it was a full two weeks before I was one hundred percent again.

Tonsil Removal

So, I get sick a lot and it is always related to my throat in some way. Since coming to live with my parents I have become insured and so I have seen an Ear Nose and Throat doctor. I explained to him that my throat seemed to hurt all the time and that I often got severely sick with my sore throat. Antibiotics no longer help and my tonsils always look as they do in the photo below. He listened patiently and then had a look. Upon seeing the beasts he said, "Not only are they swollen and red, they are ugly too!" Then he said, "Lets talk." He sat me down, looked me right in the eye and asked, "Why do you still have your tonsils?"

I do still have my tonsils, but not for much longer. This Thursday, May 13th I shall be relieved of them permanently and I couldn't be more excited. They are evil little lumps of lymphatic tissue that bring me nothing but pain.

Could I take the require time off if I had a job? According to my ENT the air here, in Abu Dhabi, is too polluted and too humid so once the surgery is complete and I am home I am not allowed to leave the house for 10 days! Should I have been employed through this I would either have to wait to have the horrid things removed OR waste my valuable vacation days to do it.

Between wonderful parents who help with my insurance and unemployment I am able to have this simple surgery that will bring so much relief. Next week there'll be post-op pics!!

My Grandfather

My Grandfather came to Abu Dhabi to stay just about five weeks ago. He has gotten weaker and needs more care as he approaches 84 years old so he came to stay in the UAE for a while! God knows what He is doing. I am able to care for this dear man, drive him around to his many doctors appointments, buy his groceries and banter with him about my "dumb cat." Had I been employed I would have been unable to do all this or serve in this way. 

Another Disappointment Ordained by God

"Thank you for your continued interest in the position.  The process is slow, which is partly due to my competing priorities.  At this point, I can’t give you any assurance about how this process is going to play out." 
This is the response I received from the newly formed ADGDC Limited. Three weeks ago I applied with them and, if you remember, I was told to await an offer. It isn't looking good. HOWEVER, the same day I received this less than encouraging email I also learned that my Grandfather is coming to live with us in Abu Dhabi!
He will need care and want company, both of which I can provide so much better if I am unemployed. 
Lord, I know not what your plans are for me but I continue to rest in your hands and will go and do what ever you want, or, as the case may be, stay and do whatever you wish of me. Your will is the best for my life and for your glory Lord. I long to live in the center of your will. 

SABBATH

“Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath to the Lord you God. On it you shall not do any work… For in six days the Lord made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, but he rested on the seventh day. Therefore the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and made it holy.” Exodus 20:8-11

As I waited for an offer over the weekend I tried hard to not be anxious. I tried to give it all to God.

This morning as I was reading “Velvet Elvis” by Rob Bell. In one section he talks about the Sabbath. God modeled taking a day of rest and he commands it. I have always been a firm believer in having a “Sabbath” or a day of rest each week, but I often forget that it isn’t just a command—it is a gift! As Rob Bell says:

"Sabbath is taking a day a week to remind myself that I did not make the world and that it will continue to exist without my efforts

Sabbath is a day when my work is done, even if it isn’t.

Sabbath is a day when my job is to enjoy. Period.

Sabbath is a day when I am fully available to myself and those I love most.

Sabbath is a day when I remember that when God made the world, he saw that it was good.

Sabbath is a day when I produce nothing.

Sabbath is a day when I remind myself that I am not a machine.

Sabbath is a day when at the end I say, “I didn’t do anything today,” and I don’t add, “And I feel so guilty.”

Abu Dhabi Gas Development Company Limited

I applied with this brand new baby company for a position as a legal assistant. Abu Dhabi Gas Development Company Limited has been created from 60% Abu Dhabi National Oil Company and 40% ConocoPhilips with the purpose of developing the sour gas field in southern Abu Dhabi.

Though 'legal assistant' isn't in my field or interests I was told that once in with this company I would access to positions in both Abu Dhabi National Oil Company AND ConocoPhillips. The project sounds fascinating and I would love to be involved in it. 

After the interview I was told they would make me an offer. After a week I learned that there are some “obstacles with HR.” I am not sure what this means…I am waiting.

October-Present:

In October I moved to Abu Dhabi to live with my parents and continue my search for work on the other side of the planet. It was hard to leave Sequim and my new friends which I had finally found there, but upon arriving in the UAE I met so many peers within the first week that it was overwhelming. It has, as of now, been the easiest move I have ever made.

Living with my parent, brother and sister-in-law I am constantly surrounded by love, support and fellowship. The group Crossroads (bible study for singles or those here without their families) which meets at our house allowed me to meet loads of new friends right off the bat. Within the 6 months of being here I have at least 10 people to call when I want to play!

Since my arrive in the UAE have contacted all 60 of the environmental consulting firms in the country. Applications for positions at multinational corporations in Iraq, Australia, Europe and Canada have been filed. Countless CVs have been passed out to the numerous friends and acquaintances who “might know someone”—people are so willing to try to help here!

As of yet the job search here hasn’t been a success but I have had interviews and answers to my emails. I have been told if they got any work they would hire me. I have received encouragement from friends and family. Though still unemployed I don’t remember the last time I felt so loved and so valued. I feel that God is continuously pouring out his love on me. I am not just provided for, but cared for deeply, encouraged when I get down, given unexpected gifts, and am experiencing richer times with Our Lord. I like to think I am growing in him and in myself as I continue to look for opportunities and contact possible employers.

For anyone out there looking for employment - find people to support you on a daily basis! Having these supporters around has been so good for me. They encourage me and love me whether or not I am employed. They motivate me to keep searching. They perk me back up after disappointments. I am so grateful to all of you!!

July-September 2009:

Upon the collapse of the daycare, two of the little girls that attended began attending ‘Cait’s House Care.’ My grandfather was so gracious in letting me care for these two girls at his house 35 hours a week. I didn’t know what I was getting myself into. These two particular girls turned out to be VERY high maintenance. They exhausted me each and every day and often frustrated me. It was the first time in my whole life in which playing with and caring for children was work. Work I felt I didn’t get paided nearly enough for!

It wasn't all bad though. I was able to run errands for Grandpa, spend afternoons at the pool or river, do art projects and play outside. They just wore me out! 

There was again lots of new learning for me. I got to see yet another family struggling to make ends meet and I learned loads about caring for children. By time the time September 9^th and the start of school came both Grandpa and I breathed large sighs of relief as my two charges returned to school and my commitment to them ended.

During this time I almost always had at least one animal I was caring for as well. I had started my own pet sitting and photography business and though I didn’t have any pet photography clients I did have several clients that I house sat and pet sat for. I loved doing this. It got me out of the house, seeing new things and meeting new friends.One of my best clients also introduced me to a new addition to Sequim--a couple just out from Boston to serve in the Coast Guard. My new friends offered lots of fun and companionship and encouragement.

Hard work, new friends, still no bites on a career type job and unemployed again...

March-June 2009

Working at the daycare was fun. Exhausting but what fun! Playing with children each day and teaching them. After working for a couple of weeks I was given charge of the 4-6 year olds. We had so much fun together! Science projects, worm hunts, art projects, playing superheroes on the playground, walks, stories, kindergarten drama, and even nap times.

I got on well with my boss. She and I had different ideas about religion but she was free to talk about it and asked for prayer regularly. She was struggling deeply though—working on getting a divorce, being single mom to her 5 year old, beginning a new business, didn’t have a working car and having health problems. On top of all this in May her mother died. At the end of May her health problems came to a head and she was taken to the hospital in an ambulance a couple of times. She had to close her business which was only just getting going. Car repair bills, her little girls needs, emergency medical care without insurance, trips home to see her dying mother, and a business not yet on its feet all led to in incomprehensible debt.

She is a sweet person and I watched and prayed as her life fell apart before our eyes. I prayed and prayed and things got worse. Sadly she couldn’t pay me the last month and I don’t ever hear from her anymore. I can’t imagine what she is going through… I don’t know how she goes on and I still pray for her often. I learned so much from this experience! About how hard life can be, about how so many live and in contrast how incredibly blessed I am. What will God use that experience for? I pray I was at least some comfort and help to this woman—some picture of Jesus. 

January-March 2009:

The months of January and February were hard. I began my search for a career type job in earnest. Though I had made stabs at finding a job while working at the groom shop I must admit my heart wasn’t in it. With the search started for real, I applied for at least 50 positions all over the US, never hearing back from a single one (despite my repeated emails and hard work). I needed another job—career position or not, I just needed work. In February began applying to all local preschools, daycares, pet shops, and assisted living facilities.

Sequim, WA, with population of 5,809 (92.2% white) and a median age of 59.3 years of age, didn’t offer me much in the way of support or social life. I tried to get involved with a church. I attended the ‘singles’ group at the largest church in town a couple of times. This group consisted of a 25 year old guy who was separated but not yet divorced, a single gal of about 26, and another gal who attended only sporadically. I found myself an outsider in this tiny, odd group of people who rarely left Washington, let alone the US. After a handful of visits at this group I didn’t go anymore. I ended each meeting feeling more depressed than I started. I began attending Sequim Community Church mostly because the wife of the associate pastor is wonderful. She and her husband had even lived in Albania for a while!! I totally connect with her but not with others at that church.

Mid-March I was called for an interview at a new daycare. I hit it off quickly with the owner, whom we shall call Miss April, and was hired at just above minimum wage. A week after I started with her I got an interview at one of the local assisted living facilities. I went to the interview—if nothing else, practicing interviews is never a bad idea. The interview ended up being a blast. The woman really affirmed me for being willing to live with and care for my grandfather. She was also passionate about animals--the interview was more like a chat with a friend. She could only offer me nights so I didn’t end up working for her but I was encouraged—I had a job playing with kids and a woman telling me she thought I was neat!

This period of life was so full of lethargy. Without much to do I did NOTHING. I was so grateful so start working at the daycare in mid-March.

Journeys of the Unemployed

September 11^th, 2008 I waved goodbye to my wonderful life and amazing friends in Erseke, Albania. I had a plan. I was going to move back to America, live with my Grandfather for about 6 months before I got a job and my own place somewhere in the Pacific Northwest.

Things did NOT go as planned. In Journeys of the Unemployed I shall share my wade through career-less-ness and the events of my unending search for that elusive job.

As I have been career-less for almost 15 months already I shall sum up all I have experienced and learned so far before beginning a journal of the present.

The BEGINNING—First Job (October-December 2008):

The first employment I sought was at a Pet Supply Corporation that shall remain nameless. Before moving to Albania I had worked in the Groom Shop of this ‘wonderful, pet loving corporate’ and enjoyed every moment of it. I hoped to hop back into the dog bather job and play while looking for my ‘career’. I was given my job back without an interview. Unfortunately there had been staff changes during those two years I was away and the new employees made my life very challenging. I found myself and clients being lied to, a very broken woman bullying her employee, and working with the dogs became oppressive instead of joyful for me. I had to learn where I have to draw lines for my own personal morality and the life that Christ calls me to lead. I ended up quitting. Having never quit before I struggled too long over the decision and then received much freedom after it was over.

This job reaffirmed in me that, though I hated those working conditions, I still loved working with both the animals and the wonderful people who own them.

After three short months back in the states I was unemployed again. I had found few jobs in my field to apply for and I never heard back from those I did apply with. It hadn’t been long but at the same time I was already disturbed at the low number of available positions to apply for.